How to Say Sorry to Your Boyfriend or Girlfriend
Here’s a million-dollar question- how to say sorry after a fight? Arguing with your partner is easy; letting the argument continue even after it has run its course is even easier, especially when ego comes into play, but cleaning up the aftermath, now that’s where it gets complicated. Once you mellow down and realize how mean you were to your partner the entire time you fought, how you might be the one at fault, or you too were at fault, the guilt hits harder than you imagined. The damages done during a conflict might be irreparable, and the only possible way out is to apologize effectively and sincerely. And one more thing, do not wait for your partner to make the first move, the same as you did not wait for your partner to raise their voice first. It doesn’t matter who says sorry first; the only thing that matters here is that both are working to save the relationship.
Relationships are bound to have conflicts, but how you solve them makes all the difference. There isn’t any hard and fast rule for apologizing but acknowledging that your partner has been hurt, trying to explain why you lost your cool, and even more importantly, saying sorry even if there’s a rational explanation to it all might do the trick. Here are some ideas on how to say sorry to your partner-
#1 Acknowledge your mistake
In the heat of the moment, you might have said things you did not mean; nevertheless, it hurt them as much as it would have if you had meant it. Now the moment has passed, and your thoughts are no longer clouded by anger. What are you feeling? Is it guilt?
Acknowledge your mistake once you have a clear mind. Tell your partner everything you feel was out of line on your part. Do so without expecting them to return the same; it will only lead to more conflicts. Only your acknowledgment and apology can relieve you of your guilt. It will also help your partner understand that you realize your mistake. After all, to err is to be human.
#2 Understand when to apologize
There are moments when the person you have hurt is not ready to accept your apology; give them time. In learning how to say sorry to someone you hurt, it is critical to understand the right time to apologize. It was your choice to hurt your partner, and now it is their choice when and how to forgive you.
There can be moments when you might not have said something hurtful with the intention of hurting them; if you sense that something you did or said might have hurt your partner’s feelings, say sorry. When in doubt, apologize. You might be saving your relationship from a conflict that otherwise would have been inevitable.
#3 Voice Your Remorse
You regret behaving the way you did, don’t you? That’s why you are reading this today in the first place. We understand your remorse, but does your partner know about it? Have you expressed it to them, or are you simply waiting for them to read your mind? The best of us are guilty of expecting our partner to understand every thought and feeling that crosses our minds. But that’s not how it works most of the time. You have to articulate your emotions, or they will go unnoticed, especially when it is about regret.
For all the girls out there, when you apologize to your boyfriend, don’t forget to tell him how bad you feel about hurting him in the first place; yes, it happened in the heat of the moment, but even so, it was absolutely unwarranted to act the way you did. You can say: “I regret hurting you, “I feel horrible for the way I acted,” or, “I wish I did not say the things I said in anger.” These are good enough to make him understand that you regret your actions and are working your way toward asking for his forgiveness. The same goes for men.
Read : 7 Useful Tips on How To Make a Guy Fall In Love With You
#4 Try To Fix What You Broke
If you are frantically looking for ideas on how to apologize to your boyfriend or girlfriend, you are in the right place. After recognizing your error and accepting responsibility, the best action is to try and make amends.
- If you have literally broken something in the heat of the moment, say- “I know it was wrong to take my anger out on this. It must have been scary for you. Please tell me, how do I replace it?”
- When you have said something hurtful- “I understand that I have been mean to you. I know I should not have said those things. I am really sorry. Please tell me how I can make it up to you?” You won’t be presuming what your partner wants and making empty promises this way. Instead, you’re leaving it to your partner to pick the best way to make amends to them.
- When you are not sure how you have hurt your partner, say- “I don’t know what I have done, but I am ready to correct myself.”
#5 Reconfirm Your Limits
You are inches away from figuring out how to say sorry to your girlfriend or boyfriend; the last step is setting healthy boundaries after a conflict. Why are boundaries necessary in every relationship? It helps you recognize how far you can go and when to stop. Even when your vision is distorted by rage, you can plainly see the line that should never be crossed. By apologizing for some actions during a conflict, you reiterate such boundaries and offer an example of desirable behavior.
After you are done apologizing for the errors in your way, sit down and reconfirm your boundaries. Express the things you won’t tolerate even in a fight, and ask your partner to tell you the same. It will ensure that neither of you behaves in the manner in which you did during the recent disagreement, leading to a more productive and constructive outcome.
And Finally
You can say sorry to your girlfriend or boyfriend as much as you want, but none of that makes any difference if you actually don’t change your ways. How you handle yourself the next time you get into a fight with your partner will reveal if you were really sorry about your actions or if you said it merely to ease your guilt. So, what’s it going to be?
