Flirting sounds all fun and game until you have to go ahead and actually do it. For most people, it does not come naturally. For instance, you see your uber-extrovert friend talking to all the beautiful women at a party, and for the most part of it, you are simply sitting beside a pillar, watching them have the time of their life and looking up articles on how to flirt with a woman.
How many times did you stutter when you had the chance to speak to your crush or ask her out? How many times have you questioned your flirting skills when the lack of them led you to lead a single life? I am guessing the number is a lot more than you’d like. Want to hear something that might lift your mood? You are not alone in this. Even your friends who seem to be naturally talented when it comes to flirting have faced some bumps along the road; people don’t talk about it.
Most men complain that women are almost impossible to flirt with; to those men, “are you sure you are flirting the correct way?” Showing a woman that you like her and want to take things ahead can be tricky. There’s the constant fear of, “am I bothering her?” No matter who says what, it is no cakewalk to flirt with a woman. You can’t just walk up to her and say, “I like you; let’s go on a date.” I mean, you can, but it’s always a gamble how she’ll react. It is always better to take things slow, gauge her reactions and then make a move. But hold on. Let’s take it slow as well. We have some tips in mind; you will certainly have some ideas about flirting with a woman like a pro by the end of the article.
Tip No. 1 On How To Flirt With A Woman: Confidence Is Key
Experts say, and so do I, confidence is essential when it comes to flirting with a woman. If you walk up to a lady and don’t know what you want to say, it might leave a negative impression on her. The best thing about being confident while you flirt is that you start believing that you can do it; that you will come out of it successfully.
What are the things that you can do to exude confidence?
- Posture is important. If you crouch or fidget while you flirt, you risk seeming unsure. Appearance can sometimes make or break it.
- Maintain eye contact. Women love nothing more than a guy who can look into their eyes while speaking. It works to show you are trustworthy.
- Lean in when you are talking. It shows you are interested in the conversation. It gives a non-verbal confirmation that you are just as engaged in it as your lady love.
- Listen intently to what she has to say. Often women complain that men only pretend to pay attention.
- Confidence is not the same as coming off rude. Read that again.
Tip No. 2: The Cookie-Cutter Responses Won’t Cut It.
When you flirt with a woman, chuck the one-size-fits-all approach. All your friends who swear by a pick-up line that works like a charm on every woman they meet- they are lying. It does not work that way.
Have you seen women flirting? They don’t use a cheesy pickup line to get the guy; they use wit and charm. And that is what you are going to do. Dump the google-suggested advice that tells you to say certain things and carry yourself a certain way while you flirt with a woman. It’s not that the people who advise you these things don’t want you to succeed or they don’t know anything. More often than not, the problem lies in the fact that something that has worked out fine for them might not work at all for you. The field of romance is not very tolerant of the one-size-fits-all approach. You have to be innovative.
For instance, the last woman you dated loved it when you complimented her on her looks. Now, you have that in mind and approach your new love interest similarly. No sooner than you told her how pretty she looks today, she flipped. Why? There might be myriad reasons. Some women think a remark on their beauty undermines the brain part.
How do you understand what approach is best for your sweetheart?
- Gauge her for a significant amount of time before you make a move. It gives you ample scope to understand what she likes and what she might not. Find out what makes her laugh, what pisses her off, what hobbies she has, the movies she enjoys the most, the genre of music she prefers, and every little detail you can find out from your initial brief conversations.
- Practice asking meaningful and deep questions, but not too personal. Plan on asking questions that give you an insight into her innate nature and the core values she follows in life. It will help you adjust your approach according to her liking.
If you wondered for a brief second if modifying your nature for her is the proper practice, the answer is yes. We are not asking you to change yourself. The idea is to modify your approach. You can’t forcefully make a woman enjoy talking about rock music if she inherently dislikes it. Similarly, she would not ask you to enjoy activities you don’t like. It is about striking a balance.
Tip No. 3: Effort is Sexy
Would you not like it if the women flirting with you put a lot of effort into winning you over? Yes, you will. It is quite the same with the opposite sex.
Women find efforts to be immensely attractive. Research shows men who put in the extra work to woo their BAE instantly become more attractive than others. They have an edge over their competitors who are not willing to go the extra mile.
What is the extra mile?
- Your girl loves a novel. You find a bookstore that sells a hardcover version or a signed copy of the same; you love how her eyes light up when you place it on the table for her to find.
- Does she love a certain band? You make sure to get her a concert ticket every time they are in town.
It isn’t much, but it makes a huge difference when you put conscious efforts to make her happy.
Tip No. 4: Make Use Of Your Funny Bone
Did you know women love men who can crack instant jokes? I mean, who doesn’t enjoy a good laugh? Let’s say, you and this girl have been flirting back and forth for a while; now is the time to bring in the humor element.
Don’t come off as too funny. It makes you seem insincere and too casual for a serious relationship. But occasional jokes and humorous remarks work in more ways than one.
The obvious way- it makes her laugh, ensuring a time well spent together.
The less obvious way- It shows off your quick wit and makes a woman more inclined towards making long-term dating plans with you.
You bring humor into the play, and bam! You have a perfectly good measure of how comfortable and compatible you two are together. It offers you the scope to gauge her sense of humor just as well. I mean, you can’t love a person who does not understand your jokes.
Tip No. 5: Play Slightly Hard To Get; Desperation Is Not A Good Look
The oldest trick in the book of flirting, and yet it is just as useful today as it was yesterday. But it does sound tricky. What if she thinks you are not interested? Or worse, she labels you as that arrogant guy who wouldn’t reply to her texts on time. Don’t worry; there is a trick to it.
Scenario 1: Imagine you bump into the woman you have been flirting with in a cafe or on the streets. Get on your phone, and ask her to hold on for a beat. It works in two ways: First- it shows that you are not so desperate for her you will miss an important call. Second- once you hang up by saying, “I have something important to attend to; can I call you later?”, you suggest a subtle assurance that when she is with you, she is your priority. Voila! You lady is thoroughly charmed.
Scenario 2: You bump into your crush, who happens to be hanging out with her friends. Strike up a conversation with the friends before you get to her. Not only will that impress her friends, whose approval matters more than you know, but she will also crave your attention, helping her realize your place in her life.
So, next time you bump into your crush unexpectedly, ignore her for a heartbeat. Not too much, though. Remember, flirting with a woman is all about the perfect balance.
Note From QuackQuack
It sounds very tricky now, but you will get a hang of it once you get out there. Not every one of your attempts at flirting will be a success, but the one that matters, will. You only need it to work once, but it should seal the deal forever.
Note: Image credit to unsplash.com